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Overheard at a pay phone, "Well, I found a whole bunch more stuff for us to buy when I get back!" Apparently he had just come from the vendors' exhibits.

During the video tribute to William Stanton, one person recalled how NENA's first office was in Stanton's basement, and that he had to saw the legs off a desk to get it down the stairs, and that the desk forever stood on 2"x4" blocks.

Want a free latte? Know what a latte is? Plant Equipment Inc. sponsored a cafe in the convention center foyer to serve them up free to attendees.

If you're a Bell South rep and a New Orleans-themed dinner is coming up, what do you buy your customers who are going? Crowns and tiaras, of course. Hey, it was the only thing the party shop had!

Tonja Bellard was so well received by one group of dispatchers on the east coast that she received an immediate invitation to come speak at their next regional meeting.

Wireless 911 Tops All Topics

Emotional Appearance by LAPD Dispatcher
Rain Dampens City But Not Spirits
William Stanton Receives Achievement Award

by Gary Allen

As rain moved into Charlotte, NENA members were dry inside the convention center, hearing more about wireless 911 than they ever wanted know.

Today also marked the appearance of Tonja Bellard, one of six Los Angeles Police dispatchers to handle the North Hollywood bank robbery shoot-out in 1997. Her presentation was frank, direct and focused on the human issues of handling such a dramatic incident.

At the end of the day, NENA held its closing dinner, capped with dancing until midnight. Since the conference basically ends at noon tomorrow, and the trade show wrapped up at 11 a.m., the attendees are winding down and preparing to go home.

Long-Term Effects

In a 45-minute talk to an overflow crowd, LAPD dispatcher Tonja Bellard explained that once the gunshots have stopped, there's still plenty of danger from handling a critical incident.

Bellard, obviously the professional, arrived 50 minutes before her talk to make sure all the A-V equipment was working, then changed into her dress uniform to give the talk. She is an 11-year veteran of LAPD, has two young children, "and a husband." Her trip to Charlotte was paid for California's NENA chapter, while NENA itself paid for her conference registration.

Bellard is very personable, but also quite straight-talking about her experience and LAPD's response to the effects that the six on-duty dispatchers suffered in the aftermath.

Bellard brought a set of photographs taken by the police department's evidence photographer of the shooting scene--bullet holes in cars, AK-47s and shell casings, and even one of the suspects after he was shot and killed. Even with all the videos that have been broadcast, and all the photos published, the small collection brought home the reality of the incident.

In the front row of the session was Kevin Garcia, a dispatcher from the Jefferson County (Colo.) sheriff's comm center, who worked the more recent Columbine High School shooting incident. She gave Garcia, and some others, LAPD pins and handcuff keychains.

Bellard asked for a show of hands on who were dispatchers, and many raised their hands. She appreciated that response and said her presentation, "will give the dispatchers the opportunity to find out that you're really OK people." Bellard set the scene by saying that it was a rather quiet morning, but then a 911 call and an officer's radio broadcast were received at almost the same moment.

Bellard played excerpts of radio logging tapes from Feb. 28, 1997 that started with an officer's broadcast of a "bank robbery in progress" call. The traffic was routine only for a few seconds, and then one officer reported "shots fired," then an officer radioed "officer down," then another, and another. After five minutes, it was obvious the officers were outgunned and that several had been shot.

During the tape, Garcia held his hand over his eyes, head lowered. Many others in the audience also stared downward, obviously affected by the sound of the officers' and dispatcher's voices. When the tape ended, there was nothing but silence. Bellard got up from her chair, fanned her face with both hands and told the audience, "I'm shaking, and I'm sure that many of you are shaking, too." She inhaled noticeably, and then added, "The emotions and the feelings that I felt that day come back like it was starting all over again today."

Bellard said she was assigned to calltaking when the incident started, and then was asked to back up one of the five Valley radio dispatchers. Within minutes, Bellard took command of the radio channel. She said all she could think about was to talk loudly and clearly, since she imagined the officers would have difficulty hearing the radio amid all the gunfire.

Bellard then recounted what happened to the officers heard on the tape, and was amazingly detailed in where they were, how they were shot and injured, and how they were eventually rescued. She told of an officer who had to apply his own tourniquet, and one who lost one-half of his blood from a gunshot wound.

She said none of the dispatchers realized the incident was being broadcast live around the world on CNN, or exactly how encompassing the incident scene had become. "Different things happened to all of us that day," Bellard said. "Some of us went into shock mode. Some of us went into work mode," she said. She didn't fault anyone who went into shock mode, because a few days later, that's exactly what happened to her.

"That day, I never heard one gunshot," Bellard said, even though they were clearly audible on the radio tapes later. "The only thing I paid attention to was those voices," she said.

She said the LAPD command staff was in a meeting downtown, and that their pagers started "beeping" almost simultaneously. The SWAT team was at the LAPD academy some 30 minutes away, and had to respond in their work-out gear instead of their standard uniforms. Field commanders asked for the location of the command post, but it was constantly being moved because of the gunfire. The officers tried to use standard procedures to handle the incident, but the situation was way beyond that. The LAPD standard radio terminology "was out the window," Bellard said.

The Personal Side

Bellard then turned to the more personal aspects of the incident. She said that after seeing this incident on TV, "What the public doesn't realize is, we were the first contact. We were the first contact the that person had with law enforcement, with the fire department." But despite that, dispatchers don't get to see the result of their 911 calls and dispatches. This can cause stress. "We don't get to finalize it," Bellard said. "We get to take that home with us, along with everything else that goes on with us every day."

When the public sees the incident on TV, they only see the field officers. "Well, you know what? I think that I had a little bit to do with what went on out there, too, and I don't need to be on the news." She was interrupted by applause.

After the incident, supervisors told the involved dispatchers to take a break. She was seven months pregnant at the time, but she felt OK--"I was doing my thing. I was in my groove"--and didn't really feel the need to take a break, but she did. The supervisors told her to get something to eat, but she also wasn't hungry. "People are asking, 'Are you OK?' That's the dumbest question you can ask someone," Bellard said, "What are they going to say?" They then sent the group home.

Bellard said she didn't believe that no officers were killed in the incident. She felt the supervisors were not telling them to lessen the impact the news might have on the dispatchers. Normally, LAPD doesn't tell the dispatchers immediately if an officer is killed in the line of duty.

Bellard said her husband, "doesn't really understand what I do and he's not really interested in what I do." So she when arrived home, she didn't discuss the incident in detail with him. The next day she returned to work. "We had no idea of the magnitude of what had happened the day before," she said.

Two or three days later she was at her console. "All of sudden I just started shaking and crying," she said. The first thing she thought of was, "not about my unborn baby, not about myself, but that people around me will see me crying." Bellard said that when a person calls 911, they expect someone strong to help them, not someone that's going to start crying.

She was barely able to get her supervisor's attention, and then took a break, but returned to the console.

Within the next few days, the press began to focus on the comm center's role in incident, and wanted to do interviews. Bellard admitted to a "gift of gab," and so she emerged as a spokesperson for all of the dispatchers. She had never had any experience with the press, and no preparation assistance from LAPD. Her face and voice on the NBC news narrated by Tom Brokaw was unsettling, Bellard said.

After a number of interviews appeared, "The other dispatchers are feeling a little....left out." During all her press contacts, "I stressed, in anything that I did was, I just happened to be the that quarterback that day. But if it wasn't for my defensive and offensive line, I wouldn't have been where I was that day. So I give them as much credit as you give me."

She then took a post-traumatic stress class, but she found it was mostly tools, and that she wasn't equipped to use them properly. She passed out an information sheet that she obtained from the class, given by PSTC, about what to do after a critical incident. It includes: acknowledge, talk it out, realize, focus, bring closure, do something physical, learn de-stressing techniques and avoid alcohol. Bellard said she had trouble accomplishing each one of the recommendations, both because of her situation and lifestyle, and the suggestions didn't really help.

One suggestion was, "You only have to cope with one moment or situation at a time." But Bellard said she was pregnant, had two kids and a stressful job. "There weren't any 'one moments' in my day at all!"

She never took a day-off, and never considered taking time off for stress. She found herself being a little more tense if an officer radioed for assistance, but added, "This is my job. They train me to do this. I'm supposed to be able to come in here and do my job every day regardless of whatever happened."

The police department then brought in a psychologist to talk to anyone who was there the day of the shooting, and who wanted to talk. However, since she felt OK, she didn't have any sympathy for the people who were crying. The sessions were not effective for Bellard.

Much Later

Some 18 months later, Bellard came to work and learned that an LAPD officer had been killed in the line of duty. "I knew my day had shifted." She worked at her console taking calls, "But I'm knowing what I need to do, but something is in the middle and I'm not able to process it, and I'm really confused."

Finally she realized that she had a problem. She called the psychologist and immediately broke down crying. The psychologist told her, "This is a different situation than what happened in North Hollywood. This is a new day, and a different situation." Bellard said, as simple as that sounds, it flipped around her thinking. "It was OK for me to be upset. It was OK for me to be sad that people that were my friends were were out there dying and bleeding."

Bellard said, "No one up to that point had ever told me that I was OK. I thought something was wrong with me for feeling this was, for getting upset every time I got a call." The psychologist challenged her to find out why she was feeling the way she did, and what baggage from previous incidents she might be carrying around. At that point, Bellard began to cope with her feelings and deal with the North Hollywood shoot-out.

"If you don't deal with (work incidents), it will come back on you at some point," Bellard told the audience. "It will still be there." She said personal tragedies don't take a holiday for dispatchers, and they're expected to continue working and handle other persons' crises.

Bellard said LAPD is more aware of critical incident stress, but said, "Dispatchers have a long way to go before they really start receiving the help that the officers do." Psychologists are there more often, she said, and supervisors are more pro-active about relieving dispatchers after critical incidents. Bellard admitted being openly critical of LAPD, but added, "Hey, if I'm lying..."

She said the police department has a chaplain, but she has seen him only once in 10 years.

The Solution

About two months after the incident, the officers at the North Hollywood Division sent a limousine for the six dispatchers who handled the incident, and brought them (with police escort) to the police station briefing early in the morning. Bellard and the others arrived to find the briefing room filled to capacity, and TV cameras everywhere.

Even the injured officers--one just released from the hospital--appeared to greet the dispatch team who worked the incident. The dispatchers were presented with angel pins--"Because you're our angels" in the words of one officer. The experience, "was the most therapeutic thing for me, more than any other debriefing" Bellard said. "To actually tough that person, and feel that person, and see that they had lived."

One officer hobbled in on a bad leg, but it was important for him to come to the meeting to say, "Thank you." Bellard said, "That meant the world to me, for someone to actually thank me for what I did."

As for credit, "I take the opportunity to get the praise for all the dispatchers, anywhere in the world," Bellard. "Because we do this every day. This is our job."

She then concluded by telling the audience that, "When everything is over, when the water is calm, it's not over for the people that handled it. So revisit your people, talk to your people again."

The audience gave Bellard a standing ovation, and then a group formed at the front of the room to meet her. Kevin Garcia immediately walked over and gave Bellard a long hug, which was followed by hugs from many others in the audience who came forward. It wasn't until the next presenter cleared his throat that the group moved into the hallway for at least another 30 minutes of talk.

The Tribute After Dinner

The closing conference dinner had a New Orleans motif, and diners were greeted by masks, party horns and other decorations at their tables. After the meal, outgoing association president Leah Senitte introduced incoming president Bill Hinkle.

Hinkle said he was initially overwhelmed when thinking of the upcoming year. But then he reflected on all the work performed by the members. He mentioned former NENA executive director William Stanton, saying he had "a contagious enthusiasm and love for 911," and praising his work over the years. Hinkle said, now, he was no longer overwhelmed, because he would have the help of the associations many experts.

Hinkle then introduced regional vice-president Jim McCausland, who presented a special award to Stanton--fittingly the "William Stanton Award" for extraordinary service to the association. McCausland praised Stanton, then introduced a video compilation of tributes from NENA members. All the segments were personal, glowing and emotional.

McCausland introduced Stanton to a standing ovation. Stanton and his wife Bobbie, who had been an integral part of the NENA organization over the years, then came on stage to accept the award. Stanton paused for a few moments to gather himself, and then with McCausland hugging his wife, said "Thank you" to NENA's members.

After Stanton's award, the Pink Flamingos took the stage to entertain the audience. They asked some audience volunteers to come on-stage to help them with several songs.

all photos and text copyright 1999, Allen Media